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poem/future song inspired by Kenneth Burke

Learning things in school is actually really useful.

What is man? What is man? But a…
Love using, love-making, love-misusing animal
Inventor of the negative, revolving our lives around what we can’t do
But unknowingly, we can, with the Truth
Purely innate with us
Naturally, emphatically
But why do we separate ourselves from this - our natural condition?
Our purity, our sanctity - torn from us by instruments of our own making
Why do we complicate life unnecessarily?
Constantly scoping who’s above us, who’s below us
Why can’t we just let ourselves be?
The human fruit, rotten with perfection
This is man. This is man. Infinite desires.
But with infinite desires must come Infinite Satisfaction

Jehovah, Jehovah, our Infinite Satisfaction
Our day star, our sunlight, our lifeline


letters to crushes

"We met over Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.  I was in Starbucks with my nose buried in the book, and she came over my shoulder and whispered, "Don’t Panic!"

…I did.  I had never seen anyone so beautiful.  I invited her to sit down, though, and she did, and we talked about the book and some of our shared interests— how we share the Ninth Doctor in common as our favorite; how we both love caramel in our hot drinks, even if it’s a spring day; how we both like winter best and would I like to go see the orchestra with her?  It’s where she was headed anyway.  I said I’d love to, I go to this Starbucks all the time because it’s right by to the concert hall.

"Who are they playing?"

"Beethoven and Grieg."

They could have been playing anyone and I would have said yes.

And that was our first date.

Next week, it’ll have been forty-two months ago.  Our forty-two month anniversary.  Three and a half years.

Next Friday I’m going to ask her to marry me at the Starbucks where we met, right before the orchestra concert we have tickets for.

It’ll be our forty-two month anniversary, and I’m going to ask her to marry me because she’s my answer to life, the universe, and everything.

And I won’t panic.”

“Do you think I am an automaton? — a machine without feelings? and can bear to have my morsel of bread snatched from my lips, and my drop of living water dashed from my cup? Do you think, because I am poor, obscure, plain, and little, I am soulless and heartless? You think wrong! — I have as much soul as you — and full as much heart! And if God had gifted me with some beauty and much wealth, I should have made it as hard for you to leave me, as it is now for me to leave you. I am not talking to you now through the medium of custom, conventionalities, nor even of mortal flesh: it is my spirit that addresses your spirit; just as if both had passed through the grave, and we stood at God’s feet, equal — as we are!”

Jane Eyre

2AM Tangents

I was sitting in mass in awe (as usual), just reflecting about how ridiculously blessed I am to be surrounded by such beautiful people (inside and out) in my life. Truly, I yearn for these simple moments of realization. And I thank Him constantly for my day-to-day interactions with people. For simple moments of light-hearted conversation. For the opportunity to share pieces of our lives, minds, hearts - genuinely. For communion with one another. For imperfect people being with other imperfect people, yet loving and embracing each other the same.

And I got to thinking: this is what life is truly about. To be and to share in being without searching how one can be of “use” to another - no! Because we are useless in the ultimate scheme of things. We’re born, we live, we die. We were created not for use, but out of love of a divine and merciful being. We are not meant to be used and were never meant to be used in the first place. The point is, we have no point - but to simply be. We are creatures made out of love for the sake of love. And this gets distorted when people constantly search from some exterior, “greater” purpose in humanity, when ultimately our sole purpose is just to be - to exist. That is our greater purpose - to be. That is what God calls us to do. It is no wonder that we get in fits about institutions and the superstructures of religion, arts, and politics. Because they are merely institutions that offer the “best” way to be, the “normal” way to be. To live. And the beautiful thing is that we each take our own journey to achieve this state of being uniquely our own. And it is with our own interactions and immersion within the world that constructs this road towards the Truth, the Ultimate Being that brings us to ourselves - that is God. 

This is what I believe the human experience is about. For though we experience so much heart-wrenching pain and suffering, at the same time, we are able to experience the magnificent phenomena that is Love. It is better to have experienced torment and love, than not to have had experienced Love at all. And amidst this experience, we must love and guide each other towards this ultimate Truth, Beauty and Goodness. This is what we are called to do on our short time here on this earth - to love one another so deeply to the point of Truth. 

This is what the human experience is all about.